Encouragement/Advice for a forlorn tenor out there

1. Be strong in the face of the inevitable mocking. They’re just jealous.

2. Never let a lead boss you around.

Prayer answered: lowest weighted tardiness initial solution algorithm breakthrough!

What that means is that if my project with Dr. Logen was getting to be like a sealed soda can that had been shaken up, now someone has popped the tab.

It was so satisfying and exciting!

It was about an hour and a half into our work session on Friday, we were making some progress, but no major breakthroughs.

My partner Brent is a computer science major so he sits at the computer and types code while we confer about logic, debugging ideas, etc.

So that’s what we were doing, trying to figure out where our logic was wrong, staring at code, trying different ideas.

And then it started coming together, culminating in a little tweak that Brent thought of. And boom! It worked! We were so happy.

We have four of these “initial solution algorithms” to code. Now that we have gotten over the hump on one, we’re really hoping that the others will fall into line fairly easily. Because, you see, there are common elements in each algorithm, and the one problem we were having is indeed common to all four.

I’m very excited about this.

This project with Dr. Logen is getting to be high-pressure for me. It hasn't been going well lately, we've been stuck on both logic and computer problems, and this is just the first part. Dr. Logen says it'll get more difficult from here.

I have such a drive not to fail on this, not to disappoint him, to do my job well...

We may decide to shift gears and use a different approach: Matlab instead of C.

Dr. Logen's a really good guy. He fully realizes that we need to be making better progress than we have, and I know he expects that, but...I don't know, he comes at it in a way that isn't in-your-face about it.

Probability is the most important concept in modern science, especially as nobody has the slightest notion what it means.

Bertrand Russell


I'm taking a Probability class this term.

The null set is a subset of the set of all possible outcomes, and it is recognized as an event of the set of all possible outcomes. But it's called the impossible event.

Seemed sort of strange to me, but hey, the math prof said it so it has to be true, right?

Per day, the average college student spends more money for alcohol than 1.2 billion people in the world spend for food.

I'm reading From Prejudice to Destruction, a historical account of Anti-Semitism traced from 1700 until right before WWII for a History of the Holocaust class. In his introduction the author, Jacob Katz, makes the point that defending ideology is very different than detached scholarship.

Katz notes a particular case of a Christian author and Christian thought being illogical as it related to the attitudes toward the Jews. He says, "...in ideological arguments, logic and consistency are hardly decisive; the train of thought is not guided by the quest for truth but by the need to justify prior beliefs." But it's the objective of scholars, on the other hand, to be as detached and objective as possible.

Couple of points here.

Looking at my own tendencies, I see this happen regularly when I'm involved in discussions or arguments. As soon as I take a position, I feel a profound need to defend my viewpoint if it is being attacked, even if it is something that I don't really care about or don't even really believe. It's pride, I think. The idea is that it becomes a personal battle between myself with my position and the other person with the alternate viewpoint. At this point the debate, from my perspective, isn't about finding the truth but about defending my position.

This is not good, and in the same way a Christian writer can be accused of being a biased ideologue because he has already made up his mind about the matter that he is defending. And obviously, this has happened many, many times. The issue that Katz is discussing is a prime example of twisted thinking to support an Anti-Semitic position.

However, if the point is finding truth, why haven't the scholars found it? They set off on self-proclaimed voyages of objective truth-finding, which if they are successful inevitably would lead them to truth. But as soon as you "find truth" that would put them in the same boat as the ideologue because those that are convinced of truth should defend it.

Unless truth is unknowable, but that would call into question the value of attempting to find it.

But assuming that truth is knowable, and honest people search for it, what must one do when they find it? Present it and defend it lucidly, but with a mind that seeks to understand the other point of view and doesn't roundly and close-mindedly condemn other viewpoints, even if you believe they are wrong.

We must have confidence that the truth of God, Jesus, Scripture, is the truth! Do we have enough confidence in that to listen to other viewpoints?

I realize this is sort of dangerous thinking because you might say, "hey, what if a young person decides to do that and goes off and enrolls in a secular philosophy department and is turned away from the faith?" Not sure how to answer that. All I know is that we must be convinced of the truth of our faith, because if it ain't true, I don't want any part of it.

I love my mom.

I'm taking a graduate class this term, and it intimidated me this morning. Small class, prerequisites I didn't know existed (and some of which I haven't satisfied), and a daunting assignment in the syllabus.

But I got over it. I know some of the grad students, the prereq's I don't satisfy aren't a huge deal, and the assignment is going to be doable.

Honestly, since I've had an undergrad version of this course (Production Planning & Control), I have a leg up on many of the students.

Then I went to Intro to Information Systems, which is a database class, and taught by our department head. The guy is...wow, high energy. Reminds me of Walter Beachy in how he get's to telling stories (but he's about as opposite of Walter in about every other area).

To show you how intense and "in-charge" he is, let me tell you a little bit about how he introduced himself: "My name is Dr. Billo, but you can call me...Dr. Billo. Got that? I demand respect from you in the classroom..."

Not a boring man. He uses cuss words in class though.

Tom sent me some singer jokes, and I picked only the very best.


What's the difference between the baritone part and a kaleidoscope?
One is an endless array of random patterns geared towards a four year old mentality, and the other is a small tube containing bits of glass you put up to your eye and rotate.

How many bass singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, five, one, five, one, five ...

Why do bad choruses do so much choreography?
1. To try to get away from the sound.
2. It's harder to hit a moving target.

Ahhh, the beginning of term. Time to frolic, play, relax...and actually read a little of your assigned readings.

See, not only do I blindly buy books, I don't generally read them! Except at the beginning of term when there's plenty of time.

But this is a problem, because I've found, when forced to read, that it actually is a worthwhile activity. But it's extremely hard to motivate oneself when the reading is only assigned, not required, and there is actual graded homework to be done.

They say that when you're writing a resume you have to brag on yourself.

Right now I'm in the midst of collecting materials for scholarship and organizational applications, and it's sort of fun, honestly. The bragging, that is.

It appeals to my academic pride.

Not sure what I think of that. Not much, if it's really making my pride flare.

I don’t think I really have a very good grasp of what forgiveness is, as it is played out between human beings. Dan Beachy was at our church for meetings this week on the topic of Marriage and Child Training (just what I needed) and this morning he talked about restoring relationships—forgiveness.

So let’s say I put ketchup at the end of my brother’s bed because I felt like he embarrassed me in front of a bunch of girls, and let’s say I soon realize what a childish and hurtful thing that was to do.

To ask his forgiveness for that is to ask him to release me of the responsibility to get even. Dan illustrated it by the idea of a scales. When I wrong someone, I tip the scales out of balance, and when I ask for forgiveness and the person grants it, they release their "right" to balance the scales, which might include, in this case, drenching my pillow with ranch dressing.

I filled out a bracket at the beginning of the tournament, and I picked three out of four final four teams! Yeah, I’m impressed too.

I am so tired.

Tell me why you're tired.

I am so tired.

Won't you tell me why?

I am so tired.

Tell me why you're tired, so I can be tired to.

Here's the reason...

What's the reason...?

Here's the reason why I'm tired today: I haven't got enough sleep, been on my feet all evening and that's why I'm tired today.

A short day of personal stuff, mostly trying to figure out whether or not to join certain academic honor societies and collecting "stuff" for scholarships I want to apply for. Oh yeah, and paying $349+ FOR MY BOOKS THIS TERM! I've got to explore on-line, see if I can find a few of the biggies substantially cheaper.